THE KISS QUOTIENT – HELEN HOANG

**Spoilers Ahead, Read On With Caution”

Helen Hoang is an author I’d never heard of until I read THE HATING GAME, and saw she was a recommended author alongside Sally Thorne. Naturally excited, I decided to give it a go, and push through my reservations with third person based books. And boy am I glad I did! Helen Hoang has a sharpness to her writing, that’s captivating and consuming. From the get-go you’re sucked straight into the books main dilemma, and it’s hurtfully addicting.

“He exhaled sharply, and his brow creased in puzzlement. “You don’t like French kissing?” “It makes me feel like a shark getting its teeth cleaned by pilot fish.” It was weird and far too personal.”

Stella Young knows it’s about time she settles down and finds a husband; at least, this is what her mother tells her. Trouble is, this isn’t an easy task for Stella. She’s wealthy and successful, yes, but Stella has Asperger’s and has increasing anxiety over knew and unknown situations. Analysing data is easy, having to handle the awkwardness of a first date situation is hard. As a way to overcome her lack of dating experience, Stella decides to hire a male escort to teach her how to be a good girlfriend.

Faced with mounting bills, Micheal decides it’s time to use his good looks and charm to make some extra cash on the side. He has a very firm no-repeat customer policy, but finds himself to be extremely tempted by Stella’s unconventional proposition. As the two begin to spend more time together feeling begin to bubble up, but neither is aware of the others. Micheal has fallen hard for Stella whilst Stella discovers that love can defy logic.

“I don’t want just a night or a week or a month with you. I want you all the time. I like you better than calculus, and math is the only thing that unites the universe.”

I can’t even say that I was apprehensive to start with, as as soon as I opened the book I was immediately sucked in as we enter on a conversation between Stella Lane and her parents. They want her to have babies, and Stella wants to get back to work as soon as possible. I loved her. I connected to her in a way one does with their best friend. Even if you share nothing of real substance in common, you unconditionally and undeniably love them for who they are, and simply want the best for them. And that’s all I wanted for Stella, I wanted the best possible outcome for her because there wasn’t a malicious or bad bone in her body. She was driven by her passion for her work and her love of economics; something I’m incredibly envious of as I wish I was as passionate about my own career. Micheal on the other hand was all mysterious charmer for the first chunk of the book. He adapted to Stella and learnt the way she ticks quickly, always making sure she was having the best time and experience; even if it was for nefarious reasons to begin with. Being a male escort, he’d seen some of the finer things at a price and wasn’t sure how he felt taking those things when Stella was involved. She was pure and questioning and eager to please Micheal too. He was always claiming (in his head, not to Stella) that he was bad, just as bad as his dad, and I just couldn’t find it in myself to believe him at any point.

“She didn’t know how to be semi-interested in something. She was either indifferent . . . or obsessed.”

Together they proved to be sugar rush sweet. Showing a compassion and consideration to one another subconsciously, and always striving to make the other feel good. They were the purest form of a wanted relationship between two people, but neither believed it to be true at the core because of how it was born. Reading their doubts was like watching that film in a horror film when the dumb girl walks down to the basement, and you’re screaming at the tv telling her not to, but of course she does anyway. They were a collision that didn’t need to happen, because they were always on the same page, but it was slightly moist with a spillage, always causing the words to start to blur.

“I have pockets, you know. You could have given me your cards and phone to hold for you.”

“I didn’t think of that. I left my phone at home because I couldn’t fit it in.” But now that she knew it was an option . . . This was why women had boyfriends.”

It was so blissful watching them fall in love in their own ways, yet together. Micheal being cautious and lead by Stella into it; and Stella just stumbling head first longingly. From their first date you just knew it was going to be something electric. They were passionate, equal and unrelenting. This is possibly one of my favourite books ever, simply because it drew me in so deeply that it was like I didn’t even notice time was moving. I was encapsulated in their life, constantly a background figure observing.

This is a love story in its best form. Quirky, passionate and jealousy-inducing. I fell in love with a book, judge me.

P.S. I prefer the US cover, it’s incredibly pretty, and I’m uber sad I couldn’t get a copy.